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MyWii.com.au \ Chuck Norris jokes

BlakKnight
Kudos: 4,735
Mates: 100
When Chuck Norris sleeps he leaves a night light on; not because he is afraid of the dark but the dark is afraid of him

World War 1 started because Chuck Norris went on vacation to Europe; World War 2 started when he went back for his wallet

We have nothing to fear but fear itself; fear itself fears Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris actually died a while back, Death just can't get the nerve to tell him
03/02/2008
Super Paper Mario
I wish I could give this day a hug!
The_MPer
Kudos: 2,583
Mates: 373
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding
02/02/2008
Super Smash Bros. Brawl
Land of the free, Home of the Whopper.
lilbill
Kudos: 1,385
Mates: 107
chuck norrises tears cure cancer.too bad he never cryed.
02/02/2008
Super Smash Bros. Brawl
philadelphia,pennsylvania,usa
jac33au
Kudos: 4,314
Mates: 124
if you spell Chuck Norris in scrabble you win forever!
02/02/2008
Wii Fit
Hervey Bay, Queensland
Silence
Kudos: 6,331
Mates: 80
Chuck Norris and Mr T walked into a bar. The bar then imploded and made a tear in the time-space continuum because that amount of true awesomeness cannot be contained in a room. They were sent back to the beginning of time. Chuck Norris blamed Mr T for what happened and roundhouse kicked him. Mr T blocked, and because such a high level of awesome should never touch, they created a massive explosion we now know as the Big Bang.
02/02/2008
Bully: Scholarship Edition
Want something for nothing? Of course you do! https://mywii.com.au/Post.aspx?id=10311&p=1 Kingsbury, Victoria
treblid
Kudos: 255
Mates: 10
1. Go to Google.com with your browser
2. Type “find Chuck Norris” in the text field.
3. Click on I’m Feeling Lucky

02/02/2008
Perth
kv95
Kudos: 8,762
Mates: 482
lol i never noticed that that is funny lol good one treblid
02/02/2008
The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
on rewards1 getting free stuff sign up herehttp://www.rewards1.com/index.php?referrer_id=91785 its real
leeman34
Kudos: 12,454
Mates: 452
taken from mywii.com.au/ another chuck thread

leeman34 said:
AP - Tough-guy actor and martial arts expert Chuck Norris has sued publisher Penguin over a book he claims unfairly exploits his famous name, based on a satirical internet list of "mythical facts" about him.
Penguin published The Truth About Chuck Norris: 400 facts about the World's Greatest Human in November.
Author Ian Spector, an undergraduate at Brown University, and two websites he runs to promote the book, including www.truthaboutchuck.com, are also named in the suit.
The book capitalises on "mythical facts" that have been circulating on the internet since 2005 that poke fun at Norris's tough-guy image and super-human abilities, the suit said.
It includes such humorous "facts" as "Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried" and "Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits," the suit said, as well as "Chuck Norris can charge a cell phone by rubbing it against his beard."
"Some of the 'facts' in the book are racist, lewd or portray Mr Norris as engaged in illegal activities,"

02/02/2008
Soul Calibur Legends
I am banned for good reason. All hail Guyver
jotendo
Kudos: 12,336
Mates: 264
as a baby,
Chuck Norris punched his way out of the womb.
03/02/2008
Super Smash Bros. Brawl
Voted Sexiest Admin of 07/08
KonkyDong
Kudos: 3,249
Mates: 212
time waits for no man, unless that man is chuck norris
03/02/2008
Guitar Hero III
waiting, watching..........................learning
Rus_A7
Kudos: 5,726
Mates: 123
Chuck Norris CAN touch MC Hammer.
03/02/2008
Strong Bad's Cool Game For Attractive People
What ever makes Robtot suffer brings joy to our hearts
MB0742
Kudos: 3,378
Mates: 806
If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.
Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

# When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

# Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

# There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

# Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

# Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

#

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
# Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

# Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

# There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

# When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

# Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
03/02/2008
Super Mario Galaxy
The computer allows you to make mistakes faster than any other invention, with the possible exception of the handgun
MB0742
Kudos: 3,378
Mates: 806
# Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

# Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

# Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

# Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

# Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost

# Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.

# Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
03/02/2008
Super Mario Galaxy
The computer allows you to make mistakes faster than any other invention, with the possible exception of the handgun
dcel8
Kudos: 1,070
Mates: 43
Chuck Norris can delete the recycle bin

When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.

Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris' PC will crash.

Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.

Chuck Norris once had a heart attack; his heart lost.

03/02/2008
Melbourne, Werribee
MB0742
Kudos: 3,378
Mates: 806
Chuck Norris can't die, he is death.
03/02/2008
Super Mario Galaxy
The computer allows you to make mistakes faster than any other invention, with the possible exception of the handgun
KonkyDong
Kudos: 3,249
Mates: 212
chuck norris doesn't wear a condom beacause there is no such thing as protection from chuck norris.
some people wear superman pajamas, superman wears chuck norris pajamas.
03/02/2008
Guitar Hero III
waiting, watching..........................learning
Wii_Man876
Kudos: 3,554
Mates: 34
Chuck Norris invented water
03/02/2008
Sydney, NSW
ICC_06
Kudos: 14,261
Mates: 492
Chuck Norris will not be happy this thread is in mywii.com.au when it should be in social what can I say he's a social kind of guy
03/02/2008
Super Mario Bros.
ten four to that!
ragin_bull
Kudos: 1,799
Mates: 1
Chuck Norris actually lives in a roundhouse.

Bruce Lee once beat Chuck Norris, but where is he now?
03/02/2008
Resident Evil 4
Gullible isn't a real word.
SirPsycho
Kudos: 557
Mates: 36
When Chuck Norris does push ups, he doesn't push himself up, he pushes the earth down.

Chuck Norris knows the last 2 digits of Pi.

Chuck Norris shot down a German fighter plane by pointing his index finger and saying "bang".

Chuck Norris shot the sherriff.. And Roundhouse kicked the deputy.
03/02/2008
Resident Evil 4
Melton, Melbourne, Victoria
zewiiman
Kudos: 1,971
Mates: 199
god, these are soooooo funny!
03/02/2008
Super Paper Mario
in your atic eating your muffins
chucky110
Kudos: 2,197
Mates: 34
Chuck norris is a joke
03/02/2008
Ninja Gaiden
Melbourne, Victoria, MarioKart Code (0087-2690-4577)
Winnie
Kudos: 2,297
Mates: 53

chucky110 said: Chuck norris is a joke



You win.
03/02/2008
Melbourne
Alyssa
Kudos: 911
Mates: 55
I like the Vin Diesel and Mr T ones better.
03/02/2008
Sydney
Elraro
Kudos: 5,278
Mates: 84
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad.
03/02/2008
Guitar Hero III
Back in Sydney. WOOT!
 
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